It’s been a battle to get to the laptop and start to write
again. This ‘battle’ has been a symptom
of my way of life in recent months: a struggle to justify why I do what I do,
and why I need to go on.
It is dangerous to go on about the appeal of suicide, partly
because, in my case, it seems like crying wolf; if I was really serious, surely
I would have done something by now?
